Good morning to everyone except the people who leave one square of toilet paper…why don't you just change the roll? ☠️

"#1 Newsletter of the Year" 🏆️ -Andy’s Wife

😱 ANDY REACTS

Sales Figures aren't the Only Things Getting High - Welcome to the New 'Joint' Venture

Well, well, well, folks, isn't it a great day to be in sales and marketing? I mean, where else can you actually benefit from the phrase, "the higher, the better," right? And no, I'm not talking about sales figures...though, I wouldn't mind those being high too.

It seems like our colleagues across various industries have decided to take the phrase quite literally. That's right. According to our dear friends at Quest Diagnostics, we've hit a 25-year high of marijuana-positive tests in the workplace. Now, I don't know about you, but I think the sales and marketing folks have been really...uh, "leafing" the way, if you catch my drift.

Now let's journey back in time a little:

• I remember this one time, I was at a networking event. I'm pretty sure more people were passing around business cards. At least, I thought they were business cards, until I realized they smelled distinctly of...well, you know...skunk?

• I've never seen more people interested in horticulture in my life.

• Suddenly, Bob from accounting wasn't just "Bob from accounting." He was Bob Marley from accounting, and he knew way too much about hydroponics for a guy who spends most of his day with spreadsheets.

Now, look, I'm all for green initiatives. I mean, who doesn't love a good salad? But this report suggests that 4.3% of the workforce must be confusing the salad bar with something else. And it's not just a "joint" issue, it’s up from 3.9% in 2021.

• Do you remember when your boss said you need to "light a fire" under your sales?

• I don't think they meant you had to light anything else!

Let's just hope that the increase in 'productivity' doesn't lead to more "high-deas" at work. The last thing we need is a sales pitch to a Doritos executive at 4:20 PM.

Oh, and by the way, if you're in marketing, just remember: this is a prime demographic we're talking about. So next time you plan a campaign, don't just aim for high engagement, aim for the HIGH engagement! But please folks, let's try to keep our own 'creativity' in the break room on the down low...and definitely not in the form of edibles!

In any case, next time you find yourself stressing about hitting that quarterly goal, maybe take a deep breath, but...you know...make sure it's just fresh air.

☠️ ANDY’S DEADLY DOODLES

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💀 Issue #100-and-something 💀

The #1 question I get in my LinkedIn DMs:

"Andy, how do I grow fast on LinkedIn?"

My advice consistently remains:

It doesn't matter if you are:

• A writer

• A data scientist

• A fitness expert

• An entrepreneur

• A personal coach

• A graphic designer

• A motivational speaker

• An education consultant

No doubt – growing your presence by posting about chatGPT and AI helps.

But the primary question reflects a common misconception...

❌ Many believe you need to grow ALONE, solely focusing on your efforts.

✅ In reality, the people who grow fast do so by growing with a COMMUNITY of others.

Here's the only strategy you need:

• Find communities of like-minded people.

• Join those communities.

• Grow together.

🔥

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• Introducing the ChatGPT app for iOS (link)

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That’s a wrap for today amigos. Eat your tacos and see you tomorrow! If you want more, be sure to follow me on Twitter (@andymewborn) or LinkedIn.

What did you think of today’s edition? (anonymous)

• 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ So f**cking fuego

• 🌶️🌶️🌶️ Meh, keep digging

• 🌶️ Snoozefest

A RECENT REVIEW